Monday, January 10, 2005

A Link That Made Me Cry

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/msg/53907245.html

That's the exact model and vintage, give or take a year (1864 or 1865).  I think it's in better shape than Mom's.  I wish like heck I could buy it.

Actually, that's not what I want.  I want to have a decent, clean, large house with space for a piano, and enough money to track down the same exact 1864 or 1865 rosewood Chickering square grand that stood at 4967 F-M Road from 1961 to 1976, and was later sold in Florida.  I want the piano in this blurry 1971 photo, the one with pieces broken off the music stand, only one working pedal, chips at the edges of some keys, and at least one key that didn't play any more.  That's what I want.  Maybe someday, I'll manage it somehow.  John will hate it.  It's not the least bit moderne, or even deco.

I know: a listing for an expensive old piano not the sort of thing that should make me cry.  It's not about the tsunami or Darfur or Iraq, victims of disaster or victims in the eternal, wrong-headed struggle of Us Vs. Them, which pretends that anyone outside one's own group is evil or subhuman.

It's just a piano. And a piano bench, which used to have the Mammoth book of popular music for piano stored in it, and Teaching Little Fingers to Play, and a book of piano duets, and Mom's yellow Chopin book.

Maybe I'm reaching out blindly for things that represent parts of my childhood, things that might somehow redeem it, reminding me that there were parts of that unhappy time that I still treasure.

Or maybe I just miss my Mom.

Karen

P.S. I just looked at that Craig's List 1864 Chickering again.  You know what?  It's NOT the same model after all.  The legs are a different shape, for one thing.

I think I'm glad about this. I didn't have the $2000 anyway.

3 comments:

justcherie said...

I know exactly what you mean.  There have been many things I have lost over the years, and while I think about replacing them once in a while, what I really want is MY property back, along with all the memories attached.  There's a part of me that thinks I shouldn't be so attached to my possessions, but I think the memories attached to objects is one of the reasons I do genealogy!

deabvt said...

Yea, Not the same one might be better for you.
V

ryanagi said...

I know. My parents sold a piece of my childhood in a yardsale. It still makes me cry to think about it. I hope you get the space AND the piano one day soon.