Friday, September 17, 2004

No Dancing! My Wedding and Other Stories

If we had chosen music, it would have been by the Beatles. Christmas gift circa 1979Weekend Assignment #24: Tell us what the first song was at your wedding reception and why you chose that song. If you're not already married, tell us the song you would like to have played first at your wedding reception. Also, for the purposes of this assignment, those of you who have had commitment ceremonies can join in the fun (it's that whole "we're going to spend the rest of our lives together, and now we're going to dance" thing).

Extra Credit: What song did you make sure wasn't played at your reception?

I have several problems with this assignment:

1. My beloved husband has never danced with me in the 27 years since we met, let alone at the reception. He doesn't like dancing. I'm not a big dancer myself.

Funny story, though, if I can jump off-topic for a minute. Many years ago I was at Marcon, a science fiction convention in Columbus, Ohio. Incongruously, one of the ballrooms at the hotel, adjacent to the ones that housed the convention, was in use that Saturday night as an actual ballroom. Middle-aged and elderly ballroom dancers in suits and formal gowns were a bit freaked out by the Klingons and Dorsai and elves and filkers hanging around nearby. As the dealers' room and other scheduled convention events wound down for the evening, the number of filkers (singers of "filksongs," original and parody science fiction and fantasy songs) sitting on the floor by the elevators grew.  When the ballroom dancers came out and headed for the elevators, the filkers were singing their version of Give Me That Old Time Religion:

I've a friend who's into voodoo
I've a friend who's into voodoo
I'll try it if you do
It's good enough for me!

As she waited for the elevator, one elegant ladyin a long green gown could be seen slapping her thigh in time to the music. I wondered whether she was aware of the unusual lyrics.  I like to think that she was.  A few weeks later, at The Continent shopping center, I again heard someone singing, "It was good enough for Loki..."

What does that have to do with my wedding? Nothing. It's just my only dancing-related anecdote, other than the fact that the only song I liked or indeed recognized at my junior prom (I went with Dan Cheney) was Roundabout by Yes. I didn't get to my senior prom.

2. I honestly don't remember whether there was any music at all in Community House that day in 1979.

The wedding of John W Blocher and Karen Christine Funk on May 19, 1979 was a small-scale, shoestring affair. That was the way I wanted it. We didn't have a million people to invite, and I thought a lavish wedding would be a silly waste of money.  My recently-divorced parents, observing detente, contributed equally to a savings account at Syracuse Savings Bank.  Every time I walked down to the bank to retrieve money for wedding expenses, I couldn't help but sing the bank's long-standing jingle:

Save more, earn more!
Dividends are best
Where parking is no problem
And people are the friendliest!
Save more, earn more!
Make your dreams come true!
At Syracuse Savings Bank
(Dong dong dong dong!)
Your hard-earned money
Earns more and more money for you!

My co-maid of honor, d. l. hobert, made me a wedding dress from a middle ages-style pattern we picked out together. I got some minimal flower package - I don't remember what kind, but something non-smelly. The wedding itself was at St. Patrick's Catholic Church across town. Father Ed Van Auken, who had previously been at St. Ann's in Manlius, had already been transferred to another church in Fulton or Tully or Pompei. He came back to St. Patrick's for the ceremony itself. (The last time I heard from him, he'd left the priesthood and become a security guard.)

I personally hired the church organist and negotiated with him over the music selections. He wouldn't perform Bach's Tocatta and Fugue in D Minor at the ceremony, on the grounds that it was wildly inappropriate, but he did play it for me once in the empty church after Mass. Score one for my preferences, though: he agreed to use Mozart's Eine Kleine Nachtmusik instead of the Wedding March for the walk down the aisle. I think we worked in Beethoven's Ode to Joy somewhere, too.

Honeymoon, May 1979As I came out of the church, I drew a laugh when I announced that "The van's transmission is fixed!"

"No, it isn't," John told me.

It was about this time that Father Ed started sweeping up the rice himself. I think I helped. Rice was not supposed to be thrown at St. Patrick's, but not all of the wedding guests had gotten that memo.

I didn't set up any music for the reception. This was held at Community House, a once-and-future fraternity house on Comstock Ave. near Syracuse University. Community House was run under the auspices of Syracuse University's multi-denominational Hendricks Chapel. I used to go every week to the TGIF wine and cheese parties at Community House for the cheese and crackers, mulled cider and soda, and lively conversations with friends. At one point I was making cucumber, cream cheese and tuna hors d'ouevres to be served there for Atkinsing purposes. The wedding reception was the last event at Community House before it was sold to some fraternity or something. I won't tell you what I did in protest, but at least I was able to party there one last time on May 19th, 1979. John and I picked up the wooden sticks and other stuff for fondue at Syracuse Restaurant Supply. We had the leftover sticks for years afterward.

John circa 1978Was there a P.A at Community House.?  Was there music? I have no idea. My big memories of the event are arriving with my new denim jacket on over my wedding dress, and opening Dragondrum by Anne McCaffrey as a wedding present. Oh, and John's college friends from his Pith radio troupe invoked The Prisoner ("I am a free man!") in their soaped window decorations on our 1962 Ford Falcon van. One of these guys was John Berton, who left ILM in 2003 after working on effects for T2, The Mummy and lots of other movies. His most recent project was I, Robot.

3. I can't illustrate this entry properly.
As previously noted in another journal entry, all our wedding pictures (which my brother Steve took) are probably in a box under other boxes in the back of a room full of boxes. But when I get home tonight I'll try to add a picture of John from that era.

Remind me to tell the story of our courtship one of these days.

Karen

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Reminder--
Tell the story of your courtship one of these days.
~~mumsy, just doin' as she's told.

Anonymous said...

Yeah! More courtship stories! And start digging for those wedding pics! I have to see this dress!!! (You know someone who works/worked for ILM? That is like my dream company to work for. LOL) -B